Thursday, November 19, 2009

International goal, and celebration, of the year

If you haven't seen this yet, it is fantastic on so many levels. Out of Tier 2 of the Swedish Elite League - this video will make your day!

Maple Leafs update

Well, Phil Kessel actually has 5 goals and 8 points in 8 games played. Ouch! However, at the quarter-pole of the season - the Leafs are 3-11-6 for 12 points and last place in the NHL!

Fresh blood on the Steamer

Here they are, the fresh faces in the Steamer line-up:Left to Right: # 91 Johnny the Greek, #61 Dr. Detroit Darryl, and # 26 Olli / Chris.

Dates - part 7 - Thanksgiving

Just a friendly reminder that this is the time of year to give thanks. So take a moment to reflect on what you are thankful for and as the Massachusetts contingent (the original home of the Pilgrims) advocates, smoking the peace pipe!
Big weekend for college hockey as the inappropriately-named, notoriously-bad-spelling and hated #2 North Dakota team visits our beloved # 3 DU Pioneers!

Goal of NHL 09/10? - # 2

New Jersey's David Clarkson celebrates appropriately after this bonanza of a goal!

Ask the STEAMER?

Dear Steamer,
I have two very serious questions based on the tantric expertise of your team:
A) Why do women fake orgasms?
B) Does size matter?

Thanks in advance!

- Vincent Bing, Balls Taint University - Muncie, Indiana

Well Vincent, we are here to help:

A) Who cares! Hey-oh!

Just kidding, the members of Steamer agree that women fake it because they can not handle any more of the ecstasy and are worried about spontaneous combustion. Since it is lasting too long, they try to have it end sooner - sort of like running time in the 3rd period.


Since we want to help you out to be able to discern, here are the 4 types of female orgasms:

1) The negative orgasm: "Oh no, oh no!"
2) The positive orgasm: "oh yes, oh yes!"
3) The religious orgasm: "Oh god, oh god!"
4) The fake orgasm: "oh Vincent, oh Vincent!" Hey-oh!

B) No.

Kentucky Hockey - who knew? Part 2


Thursday, November 12, 2009

Ask the STEAMER?

This informative segment is back.........

Dear Steamer:
I think I am losing my faith in the NHL. It is fading quicker than Sammy Sosa'a skin. Speaking of that steroid-laden ESL legend, will the NHL continue progressing towards that same crappy level as baseball. Please tell me it isn't so!

- Michael George, Essex UK

Steamer will let two of its most faith-instilling members answer this question - presenting: Pharaoh Pod and Father Bizz.

Michael -
Keep the faith, my man. While Major League Baseball does suck, remember MLB is not all of baseball. Similarly, the NHL is not really the essence of hockey.

Last year while watching Hockey Night in Canada After Hours, I watched them interview perennial choker Joe Thornton at the HP Pavilion. There was a beer league game on the ice in the back-ground. Scott Oake referenced the game and asked JT if he was familiar with the beer league. Of course he was going to say no, but he did it so condescendingly I was annoyed. It was clear at that point that he just doesn't get it. He has been a pampered prima donna for so long he has forgotten the roots of the game and how important the fans are to the sport. He is like so many pro athletes of today.

Similarly, last year several of the stick companies stopped making wooden sticks and bemoaned the NHL players not buying and using wood anymore. This was another example of trying to placate the "traditionalists" in hockey, the ones who can't see the forest through the trees (maybe its because of the extra trees?). A couple of points: 1) How many NHL players buy their sticks? I am guessing around 0%. Any chance that they give them to NHL players for that free advertising? 2) Is it hurting their profit margin selling all those $100+ composites to youth players? I think not.

There are turd-burglars running the NHL, and a lot of the players are losing their perspective. I guess the point of this rant is do not let the professionals taint your view of sports. You can love hockey for so many other reasons.

Peace out - PP and FB

The Top 25 Hockey Movies of All-Time - # 23

The Cutting Edge? OK, I'll admit that I've never seen it. According to IMDB it is about a hockey player who gets injured and becomes a figure skater. I know, it sounds as preposterous as that Jean Claude Van Damme movie (coming soon), but this list is about showcasing hockey - so play along.

Is the World Series over already? It's only November!

College basketball?

I hear it is underway. I know UCONN is always strong....and I hear great things about their volleyball team!

Kentucky Hockey - who knew? Part 1

Kentucky University, they are usually good at college basketball. Who knew they used to have a hockey program? Not I, but I love their advertising!

Dates - part 6 - Veteran's Day

Kudos to all of our Veterans, thank you for all that you have done for this country!

Top 10 moments in anthem-booer history - # 7(b)

Wow, you thought those jail-break / prison uniforms were bad? Uh-huh, they are. Giving them a run for their money were these recent sphincter-bombs.

Yes, those are yellow gloves (no offense toe socks) to go with the Christmas tree look. X-mas comes early for the Frenchies!

Goal of NHL 09/10? - # 1

Alexander Semin uses Braydon Coburn like a $2 "self-employed model" on this beauty against the Flyers.