Friday, October 31, 2008

Top 10 lists?

Always a good - over a beer - bar room discussion... check out the Top 10 hockey names!

Lumbering Left Wings?

That's right - this special order of beefcake (1/2 tripod, 1/2 howitzer) has made people wonder if the left-wing lock is being incorprated into beer league hockey. But, shockingly, they have combined for 7 goals in 5 games.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Pacific Division (predicted order of finish):

1) San Jose Sharks
Buzz: They are the "hot choice" for the cup almost every year. New coach, the D-Man they needed and a lot of young talent.
Significant Roster move(s): lost Campbell, Carle, Ozozlinsh, Rivet, and of course - fantasy legend - Patrick Rissmiller. Added Blake, Boyle and Lukowich.
Outlook: This team has shown more unfulfilled potential than Eric when he was single. But like the engaged youngster, next Spring could be special!

2) Dallas Stars
Buzz:
Sean Avery, woo-hoo. I hate this team.
Significant Roster moves: lost spare parts and added Brunnstrom and Avery.
Outlook: Not that old, but the seem to have more gray than Bizz's beard. They'll make the playoffs but with the Ribiero soccer-dives and the Turco choke-cherry-turnover - they'll be on the golf course soon enough.

3) Anaheim Ducks
Buzz: They still have a great defense and the Michelin man in goal, but can they score enough goals?
Significant roster moves: Lost Schneider, Weight, Bertuzzi and Bergeron. Added Brendan Morrison.
Outlook: This team has more distractions than the guy sitting next to Allie in the locker room, but they should make the post season.

4) The Phoenix Coyotes
Buzz: They have the great Gretzky! Actually another team with a bright future.
Significant Roster moves: Lost Ballard, Boynton, and Vrbata - added Olli Jokinen and some grit.
Outlook?: Their playoff chances are similar to the odds of Shane sobering up and getting married. Maybe in the future, but not this year!

5) Los Angeles Kings
Buzz: Next year's draft is a deep one! But really, they have good young talent and will have the best defensive corps in the league in 5 years.
Significant roster moves: lost Blake, Cammaleri, and Visnovsky - added Greene and Stoll.
Outlook: There is a better chance of the Big Bear scorekeepers getting a whole game right than the Kings making the post-season (9 shots?).

Things that amuse me - for all the teachers....

We have a lot of connections to the world of education on STEAMER, so I just had to put this one on here...

Friday, October 24, 2008

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

NHL predictions 07-08 - Central

Central Division (predicted order of finish):
1) Detroit's Hated Red Wings
Buzz: The defending champs went ahead and added Ty Conklin and Marian Hossa from Pittsburgh. Ouch!
Significant Roster move(s): see above.
Outlook: Kind of like a CU tailgate, it will go well for a long time, but I see someone ending up with a bloody lip.
2) Chicago Blackhawks
Buzz: New ownership, to includes televised games, two great young players, and two nice free-agent additions. Playoffs anyone?
Significant Roster moves: lost Lang, kept the Bulin wall, and then aded Brian Campbell and Cristobal Huet.
Outlook: Sort of like picking up girls and then hot-tubbing with Frank and Glen - it will probably be rewarding at first, but the night may come to a quick, and disappointing, end.

3) St. Louis Blues
Buzz: Nowhere to go but up, I suppose. Their franchise D-Man of the future was injured playing in a gold tournament. I can't imagine how that could happen?
Significant roster moves: None, waiting for the prospects to develop.
Outlook: kind of like Mike’s locker room stall - toe socks, white helmet, yellow gloves, wooden stick - you look at the whole production and still scratch your head.

4) Nashville Predators
Buzz: They have a great coach, but shaky ownership and diminishing funds means that talent is leaving.
Significant roster moves: lost Zilicky and Radulov.
Outlook: They have actually overachieved more than Pete and Joe did in marriage, but like Pete’s ability to be fun, and Joe’s waist-line, things are on the downward spiral.
5) Columbus Blue Jackets
Buzz: They have to make the playoffs eventually - don't they?
Significant roster moves: They were able to rob the AVS of a 1st round pick, but I digress. Added a bunch of guys you have barley heard of and dumped some soft Euros - Don Cherry would be proud.
Outlook: There is a better chance of meeting Adam for beers in the summer than them making the playoffs.

NHL 08-09 goal of the year - candidate # 1

Always liked those Czech wingers.....anyway, the Blackhawks Martin Havlat with this nice goal against the Yotes.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Northeast Division (predicted order of finish):1) Montreal's Kissing Canadiens
Buzz: They are celebrating their 100th year - whoopy-dee-frickin'-doo. Funny how championships don't come as frequently when you can't horde all the provincial talent in a 6-team league, huh?
They do have a lot of young speed and talent though. The power-play can't remain that high, can they?
Significant Roster move(s): lost Streit, Ryder and Smolinski, added Laraque and Tanguay (get ready for some drop passes)!
Outlook: Kind of like Chippendales' game each week - you expect it to go well, but you never know.

2) Ottawa Senators
Buzz: In the cup finals two years ago, started last season great than "defecated the bed." They have rid themselves of most of the prima donnas though, so look for a good year. Maybe the best 1st line in hockey, is that enough?
Significant Roster moves: lost Redden, Emery, Stillman, and Commodore - added Ruutu Jason Smith and Auld. Some addition by subtraction?
Outlook: Kind of like Anthony's game with the ladies - it is one line and a lot of hope. They have some game though, so they'll be in the post-season.

3) Boston Bruins
Buzz: Made the playoffs last year and took the # 1 seeded Habs to 7 games. They look to be on the rise.
Significant roster moves: really few, added Ryder and Wheeler.
Outlook: they are like the Tripod going over the boards: it's slow, scary, and full of its share of tumbles, but they will eventually get there!


4) Buffalo Sabres
Buzz: After years of being cheap and letting talent get away (Briere, Drury, and Campbell) they look good on paper. But do they have the health and toughness to make it to the playoffs out of this division?
Significant roster moves: Lost Bernier and Kalinin, added Rivet and signed miller to a long-term deal.
Outlook: They are like Sgt. Schultz claiming he is a C-level player and that he could win 9 out of 10 sports - it sounds good, but would you bet a paycheck on it?

5) Toronto Maple Leafs
Buzz: I assume Cliff Fletcher has a buzz after some of those off-season moves.
Significant roster moves: Significant? I guess losing Mats Sundin.
Outlook: this roster looks worse than Harlan Pepper's collection of hockey hats - don't bother putting the golf clubs in storage.

Punks of the NHL / The AVS savior - part 1

Yes, this guy is the answer! Andrew Brunette for $2.5 million, or this guy for $2.2 (source: NHLPA site)? I always thought he was a punk, and pulling on an AVS won't change that. While he at least has "the seeds" to fight, his cheap shot elbow to the head on Scott Niedermayer in the playoffs was one of the all-time bush league moves.The picture shows him pouting and here is one of his proudest moments. Notice that he precipitates this by, what else, throwing a cheap elbow at Alexi Kovalev. As Pete pointed out, this really shows the insane skill of Kovalev.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

NHL predictions 07/08

Atlantic Division (predicted order of finish):

1) Pittsburgh Penguins
Buzz: Crosby, Malkin, and a bunch of other good players. They went to the Stanley Cup finals last season and are a year wiser.
Significant Roster move(s): lost Hossa and Malone, added Satan (the Czech winger, not the actual personification of Lucifer) and Fedetenko.
Outlook: Tantalizing and fun to watch, they have more eye-catching young talent than The Professor's 5th hour class. Hey!

2) Philadelphia Flyers
Buzz: Had a good season, a bad one, and then good again. They have the skill to go a long way.
Significant Roster moves: several that make you go hmmmm.
Outlook: Sure, they will make the playoffs, but really, they are more unstable than Chub after 4 Jager shots.

3) New York Rangers
Buzz: They brought in some real streaky talent and parted ways with a lot of steady, productive players.
Significant roster moves: see above.
Outlook: their playoff prospects are like Frank in Vegas at my bachelor party - they will drop a ton of coin and will not be there long.

4) New Jersey Devils
Buzz: Brodeur will break Roy's career record for victories this year while playing some boring hockey.
Significant roster moves: They brought Rolston and Holik back but they are older than several guys on the STEAMER.
Outlook: This is the year they finally miss the playoffs. Their window has shrunk more than your junk in your cup.

5) New York Islanders
Buzz: The owner is named Wang and his team is similar to Caddyshack 2.
Significant roster moves: They lost 3 of their 5 forwards who could occasionally score, so, of course, they added a defenseman.
Outlook: good luck, there is a better chance of finding a sober Ketchum brother at an AVS game then the Isles playing in mid-April.

Summer 2008 Stats

Congrats to Harlan Pepper on another scoring title. He put up cashew-nut-like numbers with 30 points in 11 games (E5 23, Ditka 20, Prof 19, Chippendales 17).
HP led in goals with 16 (Prof and Chip 11, T-Pod 9, E5 and Ditka - 7), and was second in helpers with 14 - E5 led with 16, Ditka 13, Prof 8, Dieter, Chip, and TP with 6).

Chippendales led with 2 hat trick and 2 game winners, E5 had 2 game-tying lamp-lighters.

HP also led the "Star of the Game" points with 24. Chub had 21, Chip with 18, Ditka 17 and E5 13.

NHL predictions 07/08

Southeast Conference (predicted order of finish):

1) Washington Capitals
Buzz: loaded with talent and they have #8 Alex Ovechkin. The won the Division last year.
Significant Roster move(s): lost Huet and Kolzig, then added former AVS goalie Jose ThreeOrFour.
Outlook: This should be Reegan's favorite team as they are "mesmerizing." Them making the playoffs is as certain as Anthony missing the net with a slap shot.

2) Carolina Hurricanes
Buzz: Just won the Cup three years ago and have good talent.
Significant Roster moves: added Pitkanen, lost Cole.
Outlook: They will sneak into the playoffs, but they are like a slap shot from Howitzer - looks real good at the beginning and then you are underwhelmed.

3) Tampa Bay Lightning
Buzz: WTF? Who are these guys? They revamped their roster in the off-season like few teams in NHL history.
Significant roster moves: see NHL.com.
Outlook: they have so many changes their team has more mismatched parts than Kris Kringle's hockey bag.

4) Florida Panthers
Buzz: they followed up one of the worst trades in NHL history (Luongo to Vancouver) with another that may backfire as well.
Significant roster moves: Jokinen out, Ballard and Boynton in.
Outlook: Not good - their roster moves look more confused than JQ trying to figure out which wing he is playing.

5) Atlanta Thrashers
Buzz: They prove that if you have pictures of the owner and a donkey, you can keep your job as GM.
Significant roster moves: They still haven't replaced Marc Savard with a center for Kovalchuk's line - apparently looking for the first pick in the 2009 draft.
Outlook: looks like the draft lottery. They have less coverage than an Ingham after a shower.

Things that amuse me - part 5

...and the golf winners....

Proudly bringing the thunder on the course was these 5 stars of the game. With a reliever coming in half-way through, this stallion-fest posted a - 5 score to win the Lord Steamer Cup.
From left to right: Jacque, Joe, Adam, Glen, and Butch get their names on the most famous trophy you have never even seen! Boo-yeah!